Holy Sh*t, This Anti-Aging Cream Gives You An Actual Second Skin
by DavidCline@omgfacts.com, 7 years ago | 3 min read
And MIT scientists created it, so you know it’s legit.Eventually, we all get old. It’s pretty much that simple, really. Despite telling ourselves, “No, no, no, that can’t be my gray hair,” we’re all, at this very moment, as old as we’ve ever been and getting even older all the time. A crotchety but sweet life of bird-watching and bunions awaits every one of us, and there’s nothing we can do about it. Although our lifelong slide into puttering, liver-spotted bingo nights at the Y is completely inevitable, that hasn’t stopped us from trying damn near everything over the centuries to prevent it. Countess and murderess Elizabeth Bathory bathed in the blood of her youthful victims in hopes that it might keep her sprightly and young forever. Twelfth-century alchemists worked tirelessly (and ineffectually) trying to synthesize the Elixir of Life, which would heal all ailments, eliminate pain and extend life. Finally, every elementary schooler knows the tale of Ponce De Leon, whose quest for the Fountain of Youth led him, ironically, to “discover” Florida, today a land of orange retirees and geriatric grandpa golf. Despite a couple millennia of failure, we selfie-obsessed modernists remain as undeterred as ever in our efforts to stave off the ravages of time, and our determination just paid off with a remarkable new cosmetic courtesy of researchers at MIT. XPL is the miracle youth cream you’ve heard daytime TV doctors lie about, but this one actually works and won’t cost you eight easy installments of $24.95. The silicon-based cream, applied in two stages, forms a nearly invisible layer of “second skin” capable of reducing wrinkles, signs of aging and otherwise mimicking the suppleness and elasticity of youthful skin. While the effects are only temporary without reapplication, researchers found XPL could diminish wrinkles and signs of aging while also hydrating the underlying skin and remaining resistant to water and scrubbing for up to 24 hours. So go ahead and skydive, surf and do all the crazy things young whippersnappers do nowadays. XPL will remain (sorry in advance for this) skintight. The product makes obvious sense as a cosmetic, but its possible applications don’t stop at helping us look oh-so-spry and pretty. In conjunction with cosmetics company Living Proof, MIT researchers are exploring XPL’s effectiveness as a vehicle to deliver medicine that would help treat skin diseases like eczema. Though you can’t pop into your local Walgreens for a bottle of XPL quite yet, Living Proof has created a child company named Olivo Laboratories to develop and deliver a consumer-ready product to market. In short, eternal life is just a short ways away.
Do not show me this again